She stank, stunk, whatever the word is, like a stinky thing. Looking back, I can’t believe I was able to go through with it. I can still smell it, in my mind’s nose. And now? It’s only now at times like this i realise she was worth it.
“Did you know chewing gum was invented nine thousand years ago?” she asks. But she doesn’t care for my reply. She keeps on reading Hugs or Kisses or whatever the magazine is called. Teenage daughters are like that, all business.
Before she came along I would think “Drama Queen” anytime I watched a movie with a scene where some guy witnesses the birth of his child then runs through the hospital corridors telling strangers of his new found purpose in life. “I’m a dad, I’m a dad!” Oh give it a break, grow a pair.
When my first daughter was born I was that drama queen. I ran down the stairs to the public phone. No cell phones in those days, at least not for me. I can still remember informing my parents that they were now grandparents. I think they were more excited than me. As I spoke on the phone there was a woman waiting to use it looking at me. She started to cry. Just like the movies!
When I hung up I hugged her, just like the movies. It turned out her husband had just suffered a stroke. I felt guilty. I hugged her more gently then stepped away to allow her use the phone. Hospitals eh? Like a box of chocolates.
Two weeks later the novelty had worn off. Lads, when you’re standing over a baby that smells like a sewer rat and you have to change her nappy (diaper) reality kicks in real fast. But the crazy thing is you will do it, and you won’t mind. It’s the dirtiest job but only you can do it properly. It will be worth it in the end. That baby will be like a walking encyclopedia with her Hugs or Kisses or whatever it’s called.
Thank you for reading
Ps….in a hotel tonight and the internet must be from Jamaica maan. It’s nice and easyyy….. Grrrr